Enough of the negativity. I was in a low place last week, not very low and not for very long but long enough to have me a little worried. I needed a little perspective, but perspective is difficult to achieve when you are already low.
Even more, I was frustrated with myself because that is not who I am. I like most people come up against little problems/issues and negativity all the time, usually though I am able to work through it and either find a solution or turn it into a positive. This wasn't happening last week so I was disappointed with myself.
We have worked through it now (don't know what I would do without my husband). I have re-focused. One of the main things I needed to do was to stop planning - planning whilst good in most circumstances - can be a major issue for me. I need to learn to live in the moment and deal with issues only if they are an issue and not try to foresee every future circumstance. Live for now.
So for the time being, I am going to put my youngest daughter in occasional care for one day a week. My other children will stay in school and preschool. I will try and work mornings and evenings and if clients need me during the day, I will deal with that then.
The whole reason for me re-training was to do something I love, to help others and most of all to fit in with my family. I got swept up in all the excitement and wanted to go full on into a full time business and was feeling trapped by my children.
My family are more important than anything to me and whilst I love training and training other people, it's not much fun if the family is not happy.
If I complain again about being trapped, let me wallow for a day and then remind me that my family is everything to me and I am so very very lucky.
I am also gonna read some different books, thank you for the suggestions.